Romance is really a recent development in marriages. It was seldom thought of or even expected until Byron and Shelley broke onto the scene with their silly romantic poetry and sonnets. Well, except for scriptures written around 900 years before the birth of Christ. Song of Solomon is a full book of scripture dedicated to romance and sexual love. You see the lovers in their early years yearning for time and touch. You see them as they are married when the winds of sexuality are freed. Finally, you see them in their later years, hand in hand.

Place me like a seal over your heart,
like a seal on your arm;
for love is as strong as death,
its jealousy unyielding as the grave.
It burns like blazing fire,
like a mighty flame.
Many waters cannot quench love;
rivers cannot sweep it away.
If one were to give
all the wealth of one’s house for love,
it would be utterly scorned.

Fuel for Your Marriage

Love may be the fuel for marriage, but it is romance that makes it worth the drive.  Some people may put too much emphasis on romantic love.  Alternately,  the business of our lives, the challenges of earning money and raising children, often drain us to the point that romance is put on the back-burner and a marriage begins to cool. Like many of the important things that fuel our marriage, unless we are intentional about it, we will never find time for it.

It Doesn’t Take Much

The good news is that even a brief act of romance can go a long way. Showing your spouse that you are thinking of them during the day by sending a text; picking up some flowers on the side of the road on the way home; or lighting a candle over a pizza dinner for two shows that you think your spouse’s need for romance is important. Stealing a line of poetry from Naruda and putting it in a card to your spouse takes very little time but shows you are thinking of them in a romantic way. Spending an afternoon (this fall) walking hand in hand through Lindsey Park at dusk, or even sharing a cup of coffee after grocery shopping all add to the excitement and mystery of marriage. Throw in an annual weekend in Jefferson at a local B&B with a Ghost Tour in the evening and you have the makings of a life that, though stressed, still has an element of romance. Romance is not hard, it simply takes some time and a little creativity.

Need help thinking of creative ideas?  There are several books out there to help.   A couple I’d recommend are 1001 Ways to be Romantic by Gregory J.P. Godek and 52 Uncommon Dates: A Couple’s guide for Praying, Playing, and Staying Together by Randy Southern and Gary Chapman.  So that you continue to learn what each other likes or thinks about romance, take turns browsing through these books and use pink and blue post-it notes to tag ideas you likes.

Join Us

Of course, you could also join the gang on one of our marriage retreats. We are going to Arkansas again this fall to Degray Lake near Hot Springs. It is about 3 hours away so it is far enough to get away from the kids but close enough to get back in an emergency. We always have a lot of fun, learn something new about our spouse, and spend some time practicing romance on date night Saturday night.  While the cost is $325, we do have partial scholarships available. To get more information contact Kimmy or Bubba Watkins during our next class.

In an endless garden of flowers, I will always pick you.

a.j. Lawless

From this day forward, you shall not walk alone.  Your heart shall be my shelter and my arms will be your home.


A successful marriage requires falling in love, many times, always with the same person.

Mignon McLaughlin

A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.


Mature love has a bliss not even imagined by newlyweds.

Boyd K. Packer

Because of you, I can feel myself slowly, but surely, becoming the me I have always dreamed of being.

Tyler Knott Greggson

Whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge.

Ruth 1:16